wear that dress when you dine

I've felt pretty high lately.

I was so freaked out about trying to look for work that I went back to that internet dating thing in a moment of exasperation, as if I could only bear to be afraid of one thing at a time. The results have been pretty positive. Of course there have been the very appealing guys who didn't bother to respond but there was also a successful date on Tuesday night with a pretty cute and very funny guy. Just today I had another date, but I'm not attracted to him. Not sure what to do about that because he seems nice and "sorry, I just don't think that you're attractive" seems harsh. Friday will be yet another date with somebody with very cute pictures, I'll let you know how that goes. There are others that I'm corresponding with and have various expectations about. I'm totally crushing on one kid, just sent him a quick note and promptly convinced myself that I've scared him off and ruined everything. On the other hand there is this other fella who I'm currently (in another tab) corresponding with who is all about the intensity and asking me lots of thoughtful questions about my emotional style.

I'm also super high on all of the newcomers in my life lately. I'm now sponsoring two women, both of whom I worry for but who make me so very glad and excited and grateful. I have been all over fight club lately. It is awesome! Spoke yesterday, speaking tomorrow, going twice a day some days.

Oh, but at the moment I am tired, so very tired. It is 2 am but I am waiting for some more male attention and don't want to sleep before I get it. Crazy pants. Absolutely crazy pants.