women are well acquainted with thirst

So I've been going on a lot of dates lately. Including one that I didn't even identify as a date until well into it. And it has me thinking that maybe boys do like me. Maybe I don't have to spend my life alone, or at least my Friday nights. I think that the initial batch of "keepers" will dry up with time as far as the internet dating goes, so I don't expect this run of good fortune to necessarily last. I just intend to enjoy it while I can.

To summarize last week's meetings: 2 that I don't find attractive. 1 about whom I am very ambivalent. 2 who deserve further investigation and who I will be seeing this week as well. 1 who I'm very excited about becoming my new best friend with benefits. For good or bad, I think he'll be showing up in these pages so let's call him Mr. X. I'm tempted to gush about Mr. X but I'm doing my best to restrain myself. As if by keeping my crush to myself, I can deny it power and insulate myself from any backlash. Yeah right. Wish me luck with that one. I'm hoping that he will be exactly what I need and I'm trying not to think about how horrifyingly bad the end of my last "arrangement" was. The last thing I need is a repeat of that and maybe it's the height of foolishness to be barking up a similar tree.

Here's the thing though: I'm not going to be in my super-sexy 30's forever. I want to enjoy myself. It has been so very long since I enjoyed myself. I feel so very very lucky to have these opportunities and I don't want to waste them. So I'm trying not to. I'm trusting my gut and I'm doing my best to live life fully. If it ends in tears, well, so be it. I'd rather that than to have failed to try for something.

Speaking of trying for something, I also wowed myself by sending out my resume on Friday to a place that I would really really like to work for. I sent a follow-up email today and I'm hoping that I will hear something (positive) from them soon. This place is my number one pick for employment so there was a lot of fear about actually applying. You know my usual m.o. of not trying so I can avoid failing... Well I broke out of it, now I have to play the waiting game. I'll keep you updated on that as well.